I’ve been feeling a bit down lately, so to cheer myself up, and perhaps some of you as well, I have decided to write today’s post about compassion. It’s actually a repost from when I first started blogging, but its meaning is the same, nonetheless:
I sometimes get the feeling that we as a society are afraid feel and let others see our emotion and compassion. And sometimes we can just be flat out cold. I’m sure some of you have seen the show “What Would You Do?,” well this is a story from a first hand experience. I used to live in New York City (NYC), and as most know, NYC has thousands of homeless on the streets and in the subway trains. Sometimes that person is not homeless, but a severely disabled or scarred member of society that needs some change for surgery or what not. More often than not, these people are asking for money and food. As a child, you learn to adapt to your surroundings and you observe and blend into what is “normal.” Therefore as a child, I thought it was completely normal to ignore a person in need and pretend that they are not literally standing in front of you asking for help.
I moved away from the city when I was ten, and it wasn’t until I was an adult that I rode the subways and walked the streets of NYC again (I was visiting family). I cannot describe the immense pain and heartache I felt. The majority of that emotion was not only because the person was disabled or homeless. It was because 1) That person was being ignored by a train full of people or by hundreds of passerby and 2) I could not imagine how that person themselves felt to hear complete silence or no movement of help towards them when they ask for it (not to say that there weren’t some noble souls). Whenever I could, I gave to those on the subway some money and offered a prayer of blessing to those on the street and to those I did not have cash for. Like most, I sometimes wondered if they would actually use that money for good, and you know what I thought to myself? I say “it’s on them.” It’s on their soul if they decide to take advantage of person when he/she is doing something that they see right. I say to myself “don’t worry what others think, or what that person may do with the money. You’re doing what you think and feel is right.” I sometimes feel like we use the “they’ll use it for alcohol” excuse because we are afraid to show compassion for fear of being looked at as weak or foolish. If something is the right thing to do and it feels good, why not do it?
What is ironic about this topic is that emotion is treated completely differently when it comes to the media. Although it is their job to tell the news (and stretch the truth), the media tends to focus much too much on drama, and it is at times ridiculous and even offense. I will never forget when Steve Irwin died and the media asked his beautiful daughter, Bindi what she thought Steve would be saying to her at that time. Can you get any more invasive that? And with a child? Bindi smartly responded (and I’m sure her mother wisely prepared her for this intrusion) that the answer to that question was private. When the media was interviewing survivors after the 2011 tsunami in Japan some of the first words that they used to describe a man was “he looked like he’s been crying for days.” Then there was the question of “I know it’s hard on you, but can you describe how you’re feeling right now?” In tragedies of the past and tragedies of today this stupid question has never failed to be asked. We as viewers see the damage, destruction and the same horrific and saddened faces of people who have suffered because the media shows them over and over. We do not need to know how they feel because we can see it.
Good deeds of course happen everyday, and sometimes the media does capture it. I’m sure that most have heard the story about a cop buying and giving boots to a homeless man. Although it is great to hear good news often, I sometimes wonder why this has to be news in general. Then I remember my past experiences and realize that it is quite rare to see something like this happen. This is a good thing, and yet it is a reminder of something sad. With that being said, good deeds should be done in the shadows (when it can be helped of course). And whether we feel brave enough to do it in the open or do it when no one is looking, we can sometimes feel helpless, which can make us not help at all. We can feel helpless because we may feel like we are not able to effectively reach those in need whether they are near or far away (so we can therefore feel like our help has no impact), or because we simply don’t carry cash to give to those in need (I rarely carry cash). And to that I say “in honor of.” What I mean is, if you feel like you cannot help someone for whatever reason, do something in honor of them. For example, you can donate clothes in honor of those in natural disasters who lost everything. You can donate blood in honor of those who lost their lives. “In honor of” can also simply be giving someone a thought or prayer of hope and well-being. Even if you have the money in your pocket to give to those in need, just giving them a simple blessing from the heart is doing something. Do Something. I promise it will make you feel good and perhaps make you a little happier.
I hope today’s post has reached you. Let it light a flame inside of you.
Peace and Love,
Do you ever think to yourself “what is wrong with people these days?” or “whatever happened to manners?” or better yet: “what ever happened to common sense?” I ask myself these questions almost everyday. I’m sure you have noticed grown adults that do not cover their mouths when they sneeze or cough, or when they do, it’s in their palm, and they proceed to touch the grocery cart and other items. Do you find yourself slowly turning into a germaphobe because of other people’s lack of common sense? How about when you hold the door open for someone, and they don’t say “thank you.” Really? I don’t care if you don’t mean it, but for goodness sake, will common courtesy kill you? Because I worked in retail, I had seen my share of customers that did not respond to me when I greeted them or wished them well. I am always courteous and polite to strangers because of these experiences and simply because of my personality. However, unfortunately for me, I expect the same in return. You see, in this world, one is not always treated the way they treat others. Oh well. Perhaps it is because of this belief that manners and politeness in society are in a downward spiral: people feel like they may not receive kindness back, so they don’t give it- just a theory. I truly find it hard to believe that some people do not do the most simplistic of things like saying “thank you” or offer a polite smile in greeting. Don’t you think the world would be a much happier place if this was done more often? Sometimes I seriously feel alone in believing this and that perhaps I’m the crazy one and everyone around me is sane. Don’t you? This topic is touched upon a bit more in my post “In Honor Of” and “To Be ‘Educated’ in Society.”