Daily Archives: March 26, 2013

How Are You?

UnknownDear Readers,

“How are you?”  “How are ya?”  “How you doin’?” This is a question that I asked almost every customer when I worked in retail.  It is a question that I and most people ask strangers in greeting.  But here are the real questions: Do we mean that?  Do we really care how others are doing?  Think about it.  “How are you?” has become the same as “hello” or “hi.”  It is something that is said in passing, and is something that is not meant to truly be answered.  And when we do answer it, most of us simply and without thinking say “fine, thank you,” or “great,” etc.  Sometimes we really are “fine,” but how do you feel when someone truthfully answers the question of how they’re doing?  Taken aback?  Shocked?  Annoyed?  To be honest, I also tend to use this question as a simple greeting, but I am always pleasantly shocked and intrigued when someone gives me a true answer.  I was of course a little annoyed when they did so with a line of customers behind them, or if I was really busy and running a bunch of errands.  Even so, I made an attempt to look the person in the eye and tried to have small talk with them.  But it is because of these situations that I truly think about what I say, and mean what I say.  The same goes for the response of “and you?”  We once again tend to get surprised when a person actually gives us a truthful answer.  Instead of saying it to be polite, why not say it because you mean it?

Why is it that this phrase that allows us to be open and emphatic towards each other has become as simple as “hi?”  Does it signify society’s fear of compassion?  I once heard the story of a store clerk in a mall who asked a guy how he was doing.  The guy turned to him and said “do you really care?” and walked away.  The store clerk first thought about what a jerk the guy was and then thought to himself “wait, I really don’t care.”  I think about this story often when someone asks me how I am doing, and sometimes I feel compelled to ask if they really care.  But I don’t do so because I guess deep down I feel that they really don’t, and it kind of stings to think that.  Everyone wants to be cared for, don’t they?  So let’s care more and truly mean what we say when we ask “how are you?”  Don’t you think society needs more compassion?  I sure do.

Peace and Love

Sports & Education

Dear Readers,

I believe this to be another one of those topics that is not talked about enough.  At this time of year college basketball is extremely popular.  In the fall along with the NFL, college football and high school football are very popular as well.  Families and money-grubbing organizations are thrilled and excited about these sporting events and the players involved.  There is much happiness and honor for the families that watch their very own compete and win (hopefully), and there is happiness and honor for the players that are doing what they love and being good at it (hopefully).  Now if these high school and college athletes are indeed good at what they do, it is the hope that they will have the opportunity to be recruited by a college or a professional team.  More happiness and honor for the players and families.  This is great, but how important is education?  For example, if a high school football player is recruited by a college, is the decision to play for that school based on the school’s sporting reputation and “incentives”? Or is it based on the academics that the college has to offer?  Sure the recruiters will tell the player (namely, the parents) that the school has the best courses to offer, blah, blah, blah.  They’re a recruiter.  They’re suppose to tell you that. What about when a college athlete receives an offer for the pros that would mean leaving school early?  Do they forsake their education for the money, fame and the possible chance that they could be successful in the big league?

What if both the high schooler and college athlete end up doing terrible?  Where does that happiness and honor go?  There was the hope that they would be successful in their sport, and because so much emphasis was placed on that, they may have nothing to fall back on if that dream fails.  The questions of “what if I am not successful?” and “what if I don’t make it to the big leagues”? are not asked enough.  I truly believe in the saying that education is something that no one can take away.  One may eventually become successful, but that success fades.  Success may never even come.  One may be a great player at whatever sport, but what happens if they have a horrible injury?  What if they are successful and retire from their sport with great honor, but can’t write an essay or are poorly articulated?  Does it not matter because they have fame and money?  What happens when a player is great at their college sport, and is “loved” and looked up to, but then they do terrible in the pros and are ridiculed and rejected?  Where is the happiness and honor now?

I’m not saying that students shouldn’t have big dreams or that being a sports star is a ridiculous goal.  I am also not saying that all high school and college athletes forsake their education or never return to school.  What I am saying is that I feel like we are telling our students that education is a must, but if they have fame and money it does not matter.  I feel that society tends to idealize those who have fame and money.  And if fame and money do not come, “realistic” jobs  are negatively seen as a second choice.  As I have said in my other posts, the words “to be educated” means and does not mean a variety of things.  Education does not make one a good and nobel person.  Money does not make one a good and noble person.  You see, if my future son and/or daughter were to be placed in a situation that would have them make a decision between education and money/fame in sports, I would tell them that the choice is theirs to make.  The only words of advice that I would say is to do whatever you want as long as you help others and love God because that is your true purpose.  I do not care how much education, fame or money one has.  If they are living for themselves and have not done anything to help another, then their lives mean nothing.  Their fame means nothing.  Their money and education mean nothing.  And it is my hope that my future children and others reading this will understand that that is where true happiness and honor lie.

Peace and Love



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